Sometimes a Massage is Just a Massage – 20 Massage in 2 Months (Massage #13)

As it goes with cigars, so it goes with massage!

I received massage #13 from Jenni Morrison at the Well-Being Center for Health on Hill Street.  Click here to see a picture of Jenni.

I learned from this massage that sometimes a massage is just a massage and that this is a good thing.

As predicted in this blog’s first post, I have become overwhelmed and developed a resistance to finishing the massage odyssey.  As with Massage #12, I simply did not want to show up for Massage #13.  In fact, if I had not made the commitment to do 20 massages in 2 months this might be the point where I quit and tell everyone that it was just too much.  (It doesn’t help that I tossed in a Jin Shin Do session and a 3-day shamanic dreaming workshop – see March posts - into the midst of the massages)!  

In lieu of quitting, I had considered taking a break.  Then I realized that in order to finish by February 28 there is no time to take a week off!

If I were to quit on grounds of overwhelm I would not be telling the whole truth.  I say this because once Jenni began massage #13 I very much wanted to be there.  Afterward, I still felt great and more than that, I found myself looking forward to the next massage.

What then is going on?  Why the resistance to something I want and enjoy?  If I had to sum it up in one word I would say, “Ego,” but before I do, let me tell you a bit about the massage.

Before the massage Jenni and I spent a few minutes talking.

               “So what’s going on with you today?” she asked.

Trusting that she would not take it personally (and also that she would see the humor in it given that I was poised to disrobe for yet another massage), I said what at the moment was true for me, “I don’t want anymore massage.”

                “Ouch!”  she said with feeling and a smile.

                “No. I’m really happy to see you.” And I was. Jenni has a great personality.  “I’m up against my limits ….”

                “I know you are doing a lot,” she said sympathetically. 

                She listened to me talk about the switch in focus from neck and shoulder to feet and ankles.  I mentioned massage #11 with Avery.

                After taking it all in she suggested the perfect way to take the break I have been wanting and continue the massage marathon at the same time.  

                “So you just want relaxation,” she said.

                Relaxation.  The word was an epiphany!

                Jenni left the room.  “I’ll start you face down,” she said before closing the door behind her. 

I undressed and got onto the table.  I slid between the sheets, turned onto my stomach and put my face in the face cradle.  I waited.  Jenni reappeared with hot packs and stacked them on my back. 

She started the massage on my legs with broad strokes.  She did not use a lot of oil which felt enlivening.  She worked the area on the outside of my calves where it is often tight.  She worked lightly and without too much depth.  This meant that I was not working so hard.  I began to lighten up and relax.

We talked about movies and whether “Black Swan” and “True Grit” were any good.  We laughed about the fact massage was stressing me out, an oxymoron since massage is meant to relax.  She listened to me gripe about an irritating interaction with an acquaintance. 

As we chatted, I noticed that Jenni is skillful in another way.  She let me lead the conversation.  She fell into silence when I did.  This is one of the marks of a good massage therapist.  This skill allows for conversation that doesn’t interfere with the client’s experience of the massage.

Jenni spent a good amount of time working the soles of my feet.  As she massaged the fleshy part at the very top of the ball of the foot, my neck and shoulders relaxed.  I remembered that the reflexology points for the shoulder are located at the top of the ball of the foot and that getting reflexology or even massage work on the feet is like getting a full body treatment, internal organs and teeth included!  Past life memories and soul fragmentation aside, one obvious connection between neck and shoulders are the reflexology points in the foot!

(for more on massage #13, see next post)

Take a Deep Breath – 20 Massages in 2 Months (Massage #12 continued)

An unusual recipe for relief

Without me having to tell her Tasha immediately picked up on my waning appetite and mild dehydration.  She also noticed something I had not – that I was not breathing deeply and my diaphragm was contracted and raised up into my rib cage.  She placed her fingertips on my belly just below the rib cage.

“I’m going to use your breath to release this.  Just breathe in and on the exhale I will press down.” 

As she pressed into my flesh I felt the tender and tight diaphragm muscle give way.  As they did a burst of fear echoed through my system along with the sensation of drowning.  Tasha repeated the motion on the other side.  Afterward, she tested my breathing.  Instead of breathing shallowly I was able to fill my lungs with air. 

“This is going to sound funny but when you get home,” she said, “drink a lot of water and then climb up on a chair.  Right now your diaphragm is contracted up into your rib cage.  The weight of the water in your system will help bring the diaphragm down into its proper position. It works by gravity.” 

“Where’d you learn that?” I asked.

“I just researched it for myself,” she said.  As an afterthought she said quietly, “This must be why I was going through all of that, so I could help you.”  Tasha described that she had been dealing with a similar diaphragm contraction in herself.  I felt gratitude for Tasha’s willingness to undertake, even unwittingly, hardship so that others might be helped.  I marveled at a universe that could and would move in such a way as to make these talented, committed, and loving therapists available to offer this unique and necessary support. 

I had a sense for what Tasha was experiencing.  Often a mysterious difficulty, like fear and diaphragm contraction, will arise in a healer’s system.  Due to the discomfort and even angst this can cause the healer will typically begin researching and experimenting in order to help themselves.  Once the healer finds the solution in their own system, they are often called on to help others with a similar issue.  While there are many ways to receive training in the spiritual healing arts, this feedback loop is one way of training healers who don’t always know what they will be called upon to do.  It also help healers hone their intuition.  It is a sacrifice because it is time outside the session during which healers struggle with pain, discomfort and confusion to benefit others.

Over the last week I had noticed that Tasha was struggling with something.  “That’s quite a sacrifice,” I said.

In reply, Tasha shrugged as if her spiritual commitment made the sacrifice inconsequential.

Now after the massage with Tasha I am more energetic and very hungry. More of my breaths are deep. Fewer come up shallow.  The ache in my legs is minimal and the sharp pains in my abdomen are dissipating.  I am glad that I overcame my resistance to receiving massage # 12.  To make these changes complete, I still must process my fear but I am on better footing and have more understanding than before this massage.

Now, if you don’t mind, I am going to excuse myself … I have pizza and ice cream to eat, water to drink and a kitchen chair to jump off of….

I Really Just Wanted to Stay in Bed – 20 Massages in 2 Months (Massage #12)

Soothing decoration in the lobby of the Well-Being Center for Health on Hill Street

I received massage #12 from Tasha at the Well-Being Center for Health on Hill Street in Monroe.  Click here for a picture of Tasha.

As amazing as massage #11 was it has left me out of sorts. My body has been struggling.  It felt as if my system is seizing up.  I have been eating less and drinking less water.  I have been less active. I have been both sleepy and sleepless. An ache developed in my feet and ankles and a sharp pain below my belly button. For several days I have felt as if I were on fire someplace inside of myself.  These symptoms combined with fast life changes meant that I have been overwhelmed in more ways than one.

Truth be told the last thing I wanted was go back for another massage.  (I wanted to stay in bed!). I readied for massage #12 and my system rebelled with nausea and a kind of waiting until the last minute to get on my bike and head over to the Center.

As I walked back to the treatment room with Tasha we joked about whether I was ready for another session. “No!” I said, mock shouting, “Don’t! I can’t do it! Not again! No!”

I am grateful for this journey and remain curious about what else will be revealed.  At the same time it is turning into a forceful experience requiring me to develop new levels of self-awareness, trust, discipline, humility, endurance and the ability to be present.

“I’d be all over it. Getting this much massage,” said Tasha.

Once in the treatment room, I described to Tasha that it felt as if the flow of energy that had opened up in massage #11 was beginning to slow or was perhaps blocked and that this was creating the aching in my feet and ankles and well as sharp pain in my abdomen.

In spite of my initial resistance it soon became clear that massage #12 would be a soothing experience and that Tasha was the right therapist to work with on this day. Around the center Tasha is known as being “energetically plugged-in” which means that she is sensitive to and knows how to work with spiritual energy.

“Are you comfortable with me doing some abdominal work on you?” she asked.

“Yes,” I replied

The overall tone of the massage with Tasha was mellow. After the grand vistas that opened in massage #11 it felt right to come back to something more familiar.  Tasha began by using broad massage strokes combined with energy work up the back of my legs. 

Interestingly, the observations of previous massage therapists brought clarity to Tasha’s work. For instance, in Massage #9 Aiden had observed that there was likely a connection between the symptoms in my neck and those in my feet.  Now Tasha pressed the flat of her hand on each side of my upper back and asked me to describe how, if at all, this pressing affected my feet. 

“Tell me if, when I press down, it feels more or less balanced in the feet,” she said.  When she pressed on the right side of my back my right foot felt less balanced while the same pressing on the left created a sense of greater balance. 

“That’s crazy … that’s what Aiden indicated!” I exclaimed, “That the two are connected!”

Although I was not able to discern the nature of the connection from this exercise, it provided confirmation that the connection is in fact there.